May 21, 2018
There are tons of articles and tips that tell you what’s trending now and what proper wedding etiquette is, but you rarely here about the things you shouldn’t do when planning a wedding. Here are 5 lesser known items that you definitely shouldn’t do!
1. Don’t send e-invites.
Not that there’s anything necessarily wrong with e-invites, especially for less formal events or parties. Our world today is pretty tech-savvy, so it’s not unusual for couples to want to include electronic wedding invitations into the mix. Just keep in mind that your 80-year-old grandmother may not appreciate an emailed invitation and an online RSVP process the same way your college friends will. If you’re going to opt for e-invites, find a platform that will allow you to send matching paper invitations to select guests. Older guests will absolutely appreciate this gesture, and you’ll still save time and money with your e-invites.
2. Don’t include your registry information on your invitation.
Although this has always been a little controversial, it has never been proper etiquette for a wedding. The majority of people attending a wedding bring a gift, and couples have been creating wedding registries for decades, but including the registry information in the invitation implies that gifts are actually expected, and can definitely make a bad impression on your guests. The solution? Have your family or bridal party spread the word about where you’ve registered, or opt for creating a wedding website where you can display registry information for your guests. You don’t want people to think that you’re expecting more than just their attendance, even though most of your guests will gift you with something anyway.
3. Don’t have the bachelor/bachelorette party the night before.
While this used to be the norm, it isn’t the best idea to plan your “last night as a single guy/girl” the night before the big day. The last thing you want is to have you, your sweetheart, or half of the bridal party trying to cope with hangovers and sleep exhaustion when everyone’s supposed to be excited for the wedding. If the club you’re dying for is only an option on Friday nights, then plan your crazy night a week prior. Whatever the case may be, try to schedule it so that you have plenty of time to rest and regain some energy well before the major festivities.
4. Don’t skip on feeding your vendors.
Many of your vendors may include this in your contract, but you should definitely make this a priority even if they don’t require it. Your vendors will work tirelessly on your wedding day to make sure everything is exactly how you planned, and some of them will be there to clean up the mess long after you drive away in the getaway car. It is usually an exhausting day for many of the vendors, and it’s almost impossible to find time to eat if there isn’t food available to them. If you are serving dinner at your reception, plan with your caterer in advance so that a plate is allotted for each vendor that you’ve hired. Also, specify with your caterer that you want your vendors to receive an actual plate, since sometimes a “vendor meal” can mean a bag lunch with a tiny sandwich and cold vegetables. Feed your vendors (an actual meal) and they’re guaranteed to do a much better job for you.
5. Don’t skip on the thank you’s.
You need to write thank you notes! Your guests spent time and energy dressing up and attending your wedding, and probably purchased a nice gift. Whether you kept their gift or returned it to get the kitchen utensils from Target that you actually wanted, you still owe them a thank you for the fact that they thought about you and spent their hard-earned cash. Handwriting your thank you notes is a truly touching gesture, and lets your guests know that their attendance meant something to you. While you’re at it, write a little thank you to your vendors if they did a good job. It’ll probably mean even more to them than it does to your guests.
Avoiding these wedding planning faux-pas will absolutely save you a headache and some embarrassment. If you follow these tips your guests, vendors, and bridal party will appreciate being a part of your special day so much more, and that should make you even happier!